Pandora's Box
by faerieMagic07
Summary: Reality is grim, but I will endeavor to face death using a light shade of calligraphy.


"Who's there! Show yourself!" Lupin raised his wand, ready to attack his intruder.

There was a scuffling in his backyard and Tonks emerged from the bushes looking thorny, and flustered, but otherwise alright. "Alright! Alright!" she said, raising her hands to indicate surrender. "You don't need to be such a brick about it."

"Oh, Tonks, It's you," said Lupin lowering his wand a little. "What are you doing here? How did you get my address?"

"For the record, I wasn't stalking you."

"The thought never crossed my mind," said Lupin, with a hint of smile in his face.

"It's Sirius. He instructed me to give you this. Since he couldn't go out himself." Tonks dug deep into her pockets and produced a brown parcel tied up in strings.

Lupin received it with curiosity.

The scrawny letter was like this,

_Moony you rascal,_

_I can't get you any gifts since I can't go shopping, so I had to think of something for us both not to get bored. My gift is before your eyes. I sent Tonks there for your birthday, which is tomorrow. (I, am also the culprit who gave her your address)._

_Get your ass in here by that time so we can drink to your health. But tonight, enjoy her company._

_Yours, padfoot_

Lupin frowned. He must send Tonks home at once.

"Thank you for delivering this. You can go home now."

"That's it? You're not gonna like invite me inside the house for a bit? I mean, it's freezing."

Lupin sighed.

"Oh, I get it. You're too busy to be trifled with. I guess I'll just go. Nice seeing you tonight though." she said dissapontedly, for she was realy expecting to be invited in, like how normal people do it.

"Wait!" said Lupin, loud to stop her from possibly apparating.

Tonks raised her eyebrows.

"Let's go in and have some hot chocolate", said Lupin before he could stop himself. But he looked like he immediately regretted his decision. But Tonks was already marching inside the cottage, too fast, before he could change his mind.

"Merlin, you almost hexed me to death." said Tonks. It was Tonks' first time to enter his cottage. Everything was very homey and clean (unlike his slapdash London flat). Books were placed on a neat manner on shelves in different nooks, and the place was all full of wooden humble comforts. For a moment, Tonks was lost in a silent daydream of waking up on one of its breezy bedrooms, with the smell of the sausage and omelet ready to welcome her morning. ( A/N Seriously Tonks, it did not occur to you that you could probably cook as well? No?)

Lupin went to sit on the easy chair beside the fire with his hands pressed together and his elbows resting on his knees, of whom for the first time, was at loss on what to do.

"Do you want something?" Lupin said quitely.

"Anything would do."

"I'll go and fetch some." There was some scuffle and Lupin was gone into the kitchen behind Tonks.

"So...ahh, what do you want to drink?"

"One of your chocolates, please," said Tonks.

Remus continued to frantically prepare the meal as if his life depended on it. Which in a way, it was.

There was silence for a few minutes, as Tonks tried to find the words to express herself.

"Remus, you know why I came here," she began.

Remus stopped dead. He knew. All these days he pretended that there was nothing. But Tonks was obstinate to get the discussion going.

"You were avoiding me. I want to know why." said Tonks again. It wasn't the right words, but she wanted to express it, and the topic was too blatant to be laid in black and white.

"I was not."

"Yes you were. Because rather than admitting your feelings, you pretend to not understand out of mistaken nobility. Answer me Remus! Tell me what you really think." Tonks has risen from his chair.

"Nymphadora…" his voice was coarse. Tonks had just done it. He pressured him for some answer.

"I just told you I've fallen for you, and you weren't even man enough to tell me what you think of it. Instead, you ignore me and pretended I didn't exist. Why won't you talk to me? Why won't you simply say you don't return my feelings, so we could still stay as friends?" Tonks, desperate for his words went to the kitchen. Lupin knew she was behind him, but he did not turn to face her.

He understood what she meant. It wasn't hard to just tell her that he did not feel the same way. It wasn't.

Then suddenly, he felt Tonks embrace him from behind. Remus could have sworn he wanted to flick it away, to say no to her advances. But he became too weak to move. She was crying. He felt her tears on his tunic.

"You should," said Remus breathing slowly, "go find someone young and whole. A lot of Aurors-"

"I don't care about a hundred Aurors," said her muffled voice.

What happened to both of them? A month ago, they were just talking warmly over the fire. But now, everything was different. She was not the same Tonks anymore, a stranger, a fellow member. She was _his_ Tonks now. It was wonderful to play with the idea while it lasted. But eventually, he had to stop himself.

Tell her. Tell her politely that you don't return her feelings. It would be the wisest thing to do. But Remus did not want to move. He did not want to tell Tonks to stay away.

"Come," said Lupin, leading her by the hand to sit in the chair. Tonks sat on the wooden long bench across the fire, and accepted the hot chocolate Lupin offered with a murmur of thank you. He saw that she had calmed down a little bit.

"There are plenty of men out there, I'm sure you can stay comfortable."

"Comfortable? It's okay for you if I fall for Sirius, even though he's a convict, but not to you. I can't accept that logic."

"It's different. Sirius can look after you,"

"And you can't?"

"I'm sorry Tonks, I'm too old for you." said Remus, his voice so low and quite.

"Remus Lupin! You're as old as Sirius, do you hear yourself! And I don't care about that either."

"I don't have resources."

"You have a house, It's not as if you're an escaped convict."

"No. No community would accept me, let alone invite me to dinner. I will just drag you in my miserable world."

"Remus, please." said Tonks, pleading.

Dazed as he was by her beauty, he could not risk both their lives just by daring to be in love. "I could not risk both our lives just by daring to be in love. If something happened to you, I can't forgive myself."

"You Admit it then." said Tonks impatiently. "You like me." Then when Remus wouldn't reply, she went to kneel on her knees and rested her hands on his lap, now with expectant eyes.

"Nymphadora, for Merlin's sake, get up! I am not worth pleading to." said Remus, trying to pull her up by her elbows.

"Yes you are. I would plead every day, until you say 'Yes. Nymphadora, I like you very much. You are amusing, and impressive, and I'm seriously smitten by you tripping over the umbrella stand. Let's get married.'"

He laughed. He had forgotten how amusing she was and how she made everything light in her talks. She was becoming more and more unbearable.

"I can't make you say those, can I?" said Tonks, her face falling. "Say, are you just saying these things so you could break the news to me without breaking my heart?"


End file.
